A New Day
by You Have a Point
Summary: What if, instead of making out in the NICU, Addison and Alex slept together? How would this affect their relationship? AddexAddisex focused, with substantial MarkAddison and AddisonDerek mention. Post 3x03. Now complete with sequel.
1. Chapter 1

"Unbelievable, Karev," Addison fumed as she and Alex exited the OR.

"Oh, come on. He was about to die because his abusive father beat his mother into premature labor and death."

_God, she could be so annoying sometimes. Her hair is probably red because her venom overload seeped into it._

"Okay, so we don't try to save the baby," she stated sarcastically.

"If he was aware of the situation, would he want to be saved?"

"Every single person, no matter if it's a lost cause, if they are a serial killer, if you're making them wake up to a horrible life, we need to try to save them. We can't make the decision to purposely end someone's life without their permission."

"Whatever." He wouldn't admit she was right. He was above that.

There was fire coming out of her eyes now. He never knew dragons could look so good.

"Unbelievable. You have no respect. This is your job!"

He said something back, but he didn't really register what it was. He was just watching her lips, her eyes, her strong cheekbones…He subconsciously noted that she had stopped talking. Their eyes locked, both full of ego and righteousness. Battle cries were playing in the background.

Then the tension just snapped, and they were backing into the on call room behind them. The words "stupid interns screwing their stupid attendings" were playing mildly in the back of Alex's head, but at that moment, he didn't really care, as they shed their clothes and he stuck his hand into the magical left hand pocket of his lab coat.

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"Crap. I cannot even believe…" Addison rolled her eyes at herself as she hooked her bra back on.

"Aww. It wasn't that bad, was it?" Alex did his signature smirk, not knowing what kind of response it would get.

"Get over yourself." Alex suppressed a grin, satisfied with the small smile he got out of Addison at his last remark. "I'm turning into my ex-husband," she muttered to herself.

Alex heard, though. "Well, I already know that you were married." The look he got back was enough to shut him up while they finished getting dressed.

After they were without the distraction of various body parts showing, they faced each other.

"Can we just say it never happened and will never happen again?" Alex nodded. "Good. Make sure to get the labs for Geraldine Sullivan, and then you can catch up on charts." She turned on her heel and left the room, leaving him alone.

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please review! it will make me so much more inclined to update faster:)


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed! **

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Addison was a professional. She was a woman with class. She was a woman with dignity.

_I think it's the rain. The rain in Seattle must just wash it all away. _For ever since she had come, she lost it all. In less than a year she went from a settled down, well respected surgeon to an adulterous divorcee who just went at it with her internin an on call room.

She mentally slapped herself. She had to stop all the Satan-ness. From now on she would be professional. All she had to do was get past this one flaw. She and Alex agreed to never say anything about to each other. Everything would be fine.

"Dr. Montgomery? Mrs. Henderson, 34 weeks with twins, started having contractions last night after being on bed rest for the past week." Alex handed her a chart.

Business. She could do business. If he could do business, she could do business. "Thank you, Dr. Karev. Schedule a C-Section for 11." This was the hump day. If they could be normal today, then it would be fine.

She could do this.

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_I had sex with Addison Montgomery. _Usually, Alex Karev would've been over it by now, yet this incident surprised him. He used to be the king of one night stands, but ever since Izzie, he had shaped up. Maybe he just realized that people were breakable. That _he_ was breakable.

Yes, Izzie had definitely helped open Alex's eyes. With some help of an additional red head.

Izzie and Addison. The combination of watching the GirlHeMightPossiblyLove going after another guy, _and_ being assigned to an amazing, hot, female surgeon who didn't take any of his BS, made him grow a spine.

Of course, the tension had to snap eventually. Even New Alex couldn't avoid it. Because even though that tryst in the on call room had been like the Old Alex, it was different. He didn't reject her before either could put anything on the line. He left it open.

Because he cared about Addison, and they could plausibly—he didn't know. He wasn't heart broken that it had just turned into a one-time mess up. After all, he wasn't ready for a relationship. New Alex wasn't quite polished enough yet. Maybe in a different time, he and Addison would be together.

But for now, he was just glad the one night stand wasn't affecting their professional relationship. He and Addison had successfully gone through the day, and no one had noticed anything.

They would be fine. This was just one flaw on his path to self recovery and rebirth. Addison was helping him change, too, though he would never tell her that.

_Maybe St. Jude isn't the patron saint of lost causes after all._

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	3. Chapter 3

Thanks again to everyone who is reviewing! It really does make me more inclined to update. This is also on the GA message boards under "How We Operate" (I changed the title) :)

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Addison found Alex in the NICU at the end of the day. He was holding the hand of a preemie, with a text book propped open on top of its isolate.

Alex's behavior and attitude reminded Addison of the quadratic graphs she looked at in high school. He was improving exponentially. He had been gradually getting more human for a while, but ever since "The Incident" three and a half weeks ago, he leaped.

His surgical skills, though they had always been fairly good, started to take shape. Alex actually came to her the other day, step by step described the surgery that was taking place that afternoon, and asked to assist. His cuts, which used to be rough and hasty, as though he couldn't get it over with fast enough, became focused and steady. His memory capacity for new information was growing.

But, more importantly, Alex's biggest flaw, his respect level and bedside manner, he started to consciously work on. He made an effort to be friendly to patients, speak when asked to, and hold his tongue where before he wouldn't have thought twice to let his unwanted opinions bang around the room.

Alex was no longer the bad seed of the hospital. She had noticed him change so much. And then she realized why she had noticed.

Watching Alex in the NICU, she realized what she had to do. The feeling in her gut had grown more and more ever since The Incident. She just had to do it, tell him. Rip off the band-aid.

That didn't make it any easier though.

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Alex sensed Addison at the door of the NICU immediately. He pretended he was oblivious to her presence, though. Let her expose herself at her own pace. He could tell she was full of tension.

_This is something Old Alex wouldn't do, _Alex thought happily. He had worked so hard lately to not be the as$ he had gotten the reputation as. He knew some people would never let go of that image of him, but that was no reason not to try. It wouldn't be fair to him if he didn't try.

Old Alex was just a guard. A wall he had created, to protect himself. He had to break down that wall if he would ever be happy. And he was succeeding. The past few weeks he had been completely renovated. He definitely got strange stares from his fellow interns, other attendings.

In fact, the only one who hadn't just thought he was going through a phase was Addison. He was still working for her, unwillingly, but he didn't really mind anymore. It was almost easier to work on bedside manner with pregnant women, because he could charm them over. And sleeping babies were way cuter to study with than peeling red old guys.

And it wasn't a downside that he got to spend the whole day with a hot red head.

Who he was slightly infatuated with.

Who was now clearing her throat at the door of his sanctuary.

"Hey," she said quietly. Alex turned around. She looked like someone had let the air out of her, deflated and defeated. He cocked his head to the side, as if questioning her about her aura.

"You've been doing really well. Great, even," she quickly said, obviously trying to get something over with.

Then Alex saw the way she was looking at him, and realized what she might be about to say. It would make explain her nervousness, dread. If he was correct, it made him nervous too.

"I've been working on it. I want to improve." _That was a really intelligent thing to say._

"You have. I've noticed it a lot. Every day, it's like you've advanced a bit more." She half smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes.

He looked at her carefully, sensing something there. He wanted her to just say it. "Addison…

She poured into his eyes, knowing what could happen, what she didn't want to happen. But she had to do it. She took a deep breath, and started.

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"When I first worked with you, you were exactly who I pegged you to be. And you annoyed me and pissed me off, so I took revenge.

"I took you under my wing. And, as I predicted, at first you made a point to be especially annoying. But then, around the time I got divorced, I noticed something. You were changing.

"It's almost like you decided to shape up—why you decided to at that time, I'll probably never know, but you grew a spine. And I can guarantee, you need a spine to keep you upright every time you walk up to that table and hold a scalpel in your hands.

"So… what I'm trying to say is I think I'll always despise you a little. But a part of me kind of grew to love you. Which is why it's so hard to do this, but I have to. Mark…is an annoying, stuck up, over confident person, but you…"

"_You would be like a fresh start. I'm in love with you." Alex walks over and kisses her passionately. "I'm in love with you too."_

"I know you want to be a plastic surgeon, and he is the best. It would be greedy for me to keep you on my service any longer." No, wait; this wasn't what she was supposed to be saying. "You've learned the lesson I sought out for you to learn. I hope it wasn't all torture for you, because I think you'll be a better surgeon because of it." Torture? This was torture. He thought she was going to- it didn't matter now. "I'll talk to Dr. Bailey tomorrow about having you switched."

She sighed, having said what she needed to say. He disbelievingly watched her go. She was almost gone when she turned and said, "I'll miss you. And I'm pretty sure you'll miss me, too."

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	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks again to everyone who is reviewing. I am going to try and make future updates longer. :)**

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Alex should be ecstatic. He was free of the Vagina Squad and Satan at last. He would never again have to deliver a baby, comfort a hormonal pregnant chick, and look so medically at his favorite piece of anatomy.

Instead he got to give people new faces, new noses, cure burns, do skin grafts… the list was endless. He finally would be able to study under the best plastic surgeon in the country, instead of some righteous OB/GYN chick.

But he couldn't help but feel sad. As he thought about the new faces he could create, he couldn't help but remember the looks of the faces on new Mothers. The crackling, burned skin he would be repairing was not quite as soft as the wrinkled, red skin of a newborn.

And as he pictured Mark Sloane, who looked like he had been under a plastic knife in more than one area, he remembered Addison, who was never a mother but who could sympathize and realize the place of a woman in labor, and was still was amazing with babies.

"Karev." Sloane snapped Alex out of his daze. "Go get me a bone dry cappuccino. I need some caffeine for my next surgery. While I'm scrubbing in, fill out all my charts and check on my patients. If you finish, go down to the pit. Suturing is one of the most foremost skills of a plastic surgeon."

Alex looked at him in disbelief. He left Addison for scut and suturing?

"Move, Karev! My coffee should be here within four minutes. Now!

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No surgeries. A 20 hour shift of sutures and paperwork, and he wasn't even bored. He in fact was so busy with the sissies who don't know how to use knives and people who didn't realize glass was sharp and stupid patients who had the stupidest quirks and allergies and medications to record every hour. Alex didn't even step onto the OR floor at all except for the coffee fetch every four hours.

By 10:15 that night, Alex was ready to kill someone. Mark was a jacka.ss. He was ready for his residency to be over, and he hadn't even spent two days on plastics.

Fuming, he started to pace the hospital. He somehow gravitated towards the NICU. He wanted to visit Natalie, the preemie that he used to study with. She was a fighter. Addison had predicted her to die within minutes of her birth, but a week later, and she was still alive, pushing through.

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Addison saw Alex in the NICU. She wanted to imagine that he was there because he missed neonatal and wanted to come back. But she knew she couldn't be naïve. She left.

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Alex walked up to Natalie's isolate, and leaned his back against it. "Natalieeeeeee… Sloane is killing me. I can't even remember why I wanted to specialize in plastics in the first place."

He looked at the time. 10:45. His shift started at 6 the next morning, he should get home. "I…okay Natalie, you can't tell anyone this…I miss Addison. I was used to being with her in the day. Today was unreal, like I had started associating work with her." He sighed. "Do you have any advice for me Natalie?"

He reached through the isolate to grab her hand. It wasn't there. He turned around. "Natalie?" She was gone. The isolate was empty. He looked around frantically for her chart. He found it nearby.

Natalie McCain, time of death 10:07.

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**I thought I would end on a happy note... ;)**


	5. Chapter 5

**So this isn't much longer, but oh well. I am still trying to figure out how to reply to reviews, but I really do appreciate everyone who has taken the time to do so. If you are just lurking and reading this, I have no way of knowing that, so please review!**

**This chapter sort of goes in a circle, just so you know. I didn't mean for it to happen like that, but it did.**

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A month. The same torture for 30 days. The pit had exactly 438 ceiling tiles. The hot sleeves Starbucks puts on their coffee cups have 200 bumps. Alex's tolerance for annoying surgeons was 31 days.

Sloane was in the middle of a face reconstruction, but Alex's sutures hadn't been exactly perfect the day before, so he couldn't scrub in. Alex snuck off to the NICU.

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Addison had watched Mark Sloane torment her ex intern for the past month. It was infuriating. She knew Alex couldn't do anything about it, because Mark was his boss. She couldn't mention anything without arousing questions about why she knew about the treatment Alex was getting.

Then she came up with a plan.

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Alex was in the NICU, caught up in his self misery. Mark could go die. He didn't deserve anything. He probably cheated his way into med school. And he was so self assured. Hell, he made mistakes too. Alex was a human, for god's sake, not a slave. It was like Mark was some pureblood prince of godliness, and Alex was some disgrace to the human race. If I could get away with it, I would just….

"He's allergic to cinnamon."

Alex turned around just in time to see a flash of red hair through the doorway and disappear down the hall.

He didn't need to ask who she was talking about.

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"Dr. Montgomery? The chief wants to speak to you in his office. He says it is urgent."

"Okay, I'll be there in a sec." Hmm. What could be so urgent? He didn't have another brain tumor did he? She noticed Alex not-so-subtly stalking the office. When she made eye contact with him, he looked annoyed with her. What was going on?

As soon as she entered, she knew what it was about. Sh1t.

Mark was keeling over, hanging onto the edge of the desk for support

"It seems Mark is having an allergic reaction to cinnamon," the chief stated coolly.

"No really? I didn't notice."

"ADDISON. Dr. Sloane explained to me, while he could still speak, that you were the only one who knows about his allergy. And he was always careful about never having cinnamon." Addison then knew where the conversation was going.

"I know you two have been having…issues lately, but poisoning my head of plastic surgery is unacceptable."

"But—."

"Did you not do it?"

She can't rat out Alex. Who else could she blame? Besides it was her idea. She opens her mouth to say yes. "I--."

Alex bursts into the room. "Dr. Sloane, I have the labs—are you okay?"

"He's having an allergic reaction to some cinnamon Addison force fed to him."

Alex's eyes widened. "Oh, sh1t. I am so sorry Dr. Sloane. I—okay, I was mad at you, so I, um, tampered with your coffee. I didn't know you were allergic to cinnamon, I just wanted to mess up your perfect coffee."

"Karev! Do you realize your immature, stupid prank has intoxicated Dr. Sloane? Sloane! Addison! Out. I need to have a talk with Dr. Karev and his resident."

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"So, what punishment do you recommend for Dr. Karev, Miranda?"

"Well, last time he got in trouble, he got assigned to Dr. Montgomery for a while. That seemed to straighten him out, and he despises OB/GYN."

"Well, that seems fitting considering I almost punished Addie for his prank. Very well. Dr. Karev will be assigned to the neonatal service for the next 15 days."

Richard sighed. Stupid interns….

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15 days of complete heaven.

On the first day, he and Addison saved a preemie that had a sudden bowel obstruction. After 8 hours of surgery, he pulled through.

Addison never sent Alex to do sutures, never expected him to get coffee for her. All she expected from him was respect. New Alex could give it easily.

It wasn't a downside he got to spend all day with eye candy. Not that Bailey wasn't hot in her own flaming, burning way, but still—between Addison and all the cute babies he gave birth to, he was a happy man. Old Alex was just turning into an old nightmare that had faded into the past. He was growing up.

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But 15 days wasn't forever, and before he had time to say "scalpel" he was packing up his books in the NICU. He wanted to stay so badly on neonatal. Even without Addison, giving birth to babies and comforting soon to be moms was so much more rewarding than stitching up some cuts.

Addison came in and saw him leaving. If it were up to her, she wouldn't the one making him go back to plastics this time. But she saw him ready to leave once and for all on his own free will. She couldn't wallow in the past.

He saw her there, but couldn't bring himself to make eye contact with her, or speak to her. He continued to gather his stuff. Then he got an idea. Why should he go back to Plastics at all? Mark certainly wasn't looking forward to his arrival. He had grown to love this specialty. What if he just stayed?

He made up his mind. He turned around and looked her square in the eye opened his mouth and said-

"It was fun. I'm glad this was my punishment. Even if it was your fault I was in trouble in the first place." He left.

Dam.n it. I chickened out. Whatever. He still loved plastics. It was his calling. Mark was the only problem with it. Without Mark, he would be completely content on Plastics. Even more so than neonatal. He walked away without giving a second glance back.

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	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks again to everyone who has reviewed, you are really making my writing experience so much more enjoyable. Lurkers (you know who you are) please review! I just realized I had anonymous reviews disabled, so I enabled those. I'm super smart. ;) **

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Two weeks of the same torture. Alex had half a mind to switch to Orthopedics if it meant he could get off of Sloane. But he knew that Sloane was the problem. He still wanted plastics, and he would be happy if he just got a better mentor.

One day, everything changed.

Mark called in sick, and Alex had to shadow Dr. Devery, who came in from Seattle Presbyterian for the day. He let Alex scrub in on two surgeries, work with a burn patient, and watch first hand a bone harvest.

And Alex felt absolutely nothing.

In High School, Alex had a crush on this girl Emily. He wooed her, and pursued her, and finally convinced her to go on a date. At the end of the date they kissed. But Alex didn't feel anything. No sparks, fireworks, butterflies, tingles, nothing. After that date, he blew her off a few times before she got the picture.

Even without Mark, Alex didn't really care about burns. The surgeries were boring as hell. Heck, he was yawning through out the whole bone harvest.

He never really liked plastics. There were no sparks, fireworks, butterflies, tingles, nothing. Absolutely nothing. At the end of the day he went directly to Addison.

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Alex found her in the NICU. He cleared his throat. "Addi- Dr. Montgomery? Can I speak with you?" She looked up, slightly bewildered, but nodded.

"Okay, so here's the thing. Old Alex wanted to go into plastics. He wanted to go into it because it was macho, and cool, and something to brag about. It was cool to make people pretty because God knows life didn't mean anything if you weren't pretty.

"But then something happened. Izzie. I met her, and at first it was just another little bout of infatuation for a pretty girl, but then—it was different, and I liked her so much, I had problems, I cheated on her—this isn't making any sense at all, is it?"

"No, I get it actually. Go on."

"Well, finally Izzie forgave me and we were great together, but then Denny came and when she left me for what seemed to be the lesser man—I just realized that all this time I had been the lesser man.

"And then you came, and recruited me to—well, to the Vagina Squad. So now there were two completely amazing women who saw me for the weasel that I was. And…I resolved to change, because I strive for excellence, and I refused to be the lesser man anymore.

"So I changed. Old Alex disappeared while I was on your service, and New Alex was born.

"But then I went back to plastics. And it had lost all of its old excitement and thrills, and I kept thinking back to this, and how much more rewarding it was to give someone a new baby than it was to give someone a new face.

"Plastics were also squelching New Alex. Plastics were perfect a year ago for me, but the new me was suffocating.

"And then I came back to you for punishment again, and it felt like everything was falling into place.

"So what I'm trying to say is- Old Alex was a plastics guy. But New Alex, the guy I'm trying to be, the better man, he……. He would really appreciate it if he could stay on your service."

It took Addison a few seconds to recover. Then the pride set in.

"I've been waiting for that speech ever since you saved Melanie's baby from the damage control surgery. Of course, I never expected it to be in the third person, but I'm not complaining. I'll talk to Bailey, and you should be back on my service by tomorrow."

Before she left, she said one more thing.

"I knew you'd miss me."

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"What's wrong?" A 911 at 6 am had brought Addison and Alex to the hospital. "I started having contractions- he isn't due for another 6 weeks!"

"Okay, Mrs. Sullivan-"

"Heather, please."

"Okay Heather we are scheduling an emergency C-section to get your son out of there, and we will most likely have to take him directly into surgery afterwards. "

"Whatever you can do to save my baby."

"Okay then."

When Alex and Addison scrubbed in, they saw the fetus hadn't had enough room, causing lack of circulation thorough out his body. Alex took him out.

"Is he okay?" Heather asked.

"We'll do everything we can, but you are fine, I am going to ask Dr. Greene to close you up, okay? We will let you know about your son as soon as possible."

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Four hours later, Alex and Addison scrubbed out and washed their hands.

"Do you want me to inform the mother? You've been here for over 24 hours."

"Thank you, Alex. I may drop by before I head home." Addison smiled weakly. Alex returned it.

As Addison was leaving, she noticed something. When Alex smiled at her she felt-

Stop it Addison, you've had a long day. It wasn't anything. She left without another word.

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Alex entered Heather's room with her chart. "How are you feeling?"

"How is my baby?" Her eyes were wide with fear.

Alex took a deep breath. "Heather, you have to understand. You son—"

"Samuel."

"Samuel didn't have enough room in your womb, which caused his body to have to sit in an abnormal position for your pregnancy. His legs got twisted under his body, and didn't get enough blood. Dr. Montgomery and I did everything we could, but…"

"Just say it." Heather started to cry.

"The lower half of his body will be paralyzed. We might be able to do something when he is older but…"

"No. he's my little baby. He's so small. How can he be flawed already?" Heather cried. Alex saw her blood pressure rising. He walked over to the bed and sat down.

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Addison was about to go "home", but decided to check up on Heather. When she walked by her room, she saw Alex there. He was rubbing Heather's back. Addison felt like she recognized that from somewhere.

Then it hit her. That was what Alex had done to her during their quickie in the on-call room months before, as they recovered from their highs. She remembered how it seemed to be telling her something, how even though what happened would have consequences later on, right here, right now they were okay.

Addison felt tears spring to her eyes. Da.mnit. What was happening to her? She turned around and left the hospital, seeking someone she knew would help her.

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	7. Chapter 7

**This chapter... I wrote this fanfic in the hope that it could realistically portray what could have happened to Alex and Addison in Season 3. This chapter doesn't seem quite so believable, but this stuff kind of had to happen for the purposes of character development. With that in mind, this should be forewarning you that the end of this fanfic will be the Season 3 finale, which means, as you all know, CLIFFHANGER!!! I know how it will end already, but I am not sure if I will do a sequel...**

**Okay, I'm rambling about a whole bunch of stuff that will happen in the future. On with the chapter! Please read and review with any constructive critisism, ideas, suggestions, etc.**

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Addison showed up at Callie's door at 11 PM with a bottle of wine.

Callie took one look at her friend and said, "No puking in my hotel room."

Addison nodded and stumbled inside. They plopped down on the couch.

"I had sex with Karev."

Callie spluttered. "Well, that's one way to help me not over-eat," she muttered in disgust.

"Callie!"

"Okay, okay, I'll hear you out."

"I had sex with him months ago!"

"So why are we talking about it now?"

"Because-" _Why were they talking about it?_ "Something happened."

"You slept with him again?"

Addison sighed. "You don't have any respect for me. Or hope in me."

"Nope," Callie agreed, and took another sip of wine.

"Well, he's changed a lot. He isn't the cocky smart-as$ he used to be. He's—gentler, and sweeter, and kinder, and—"

"No." Callie looked at her friend in disbelief, and, well, sympathy.

"He came groveling back to me to be on my service after a while on plastics. I helped him poison Mark. He's changed, and it's- today, I just felt something." She looked up at Callie. "Tell me I'm hallucinating?"

Callie just stared at her. "Holy-."

"What?!"

She shook her head gently. "You have feelings for him."

Addison's worst fears were true. "But I can't! He's Karev! He's my intern! I've already slept with him, for God's sake!"

"These things take time sometimes. What are you going to do?"

"Oh, yeah, I'll just ask him out tomorrow, of course I'm not going to do anything!"

Callie sighed. "I guess that's for the best. But what if he likes you too?"

Addison looked up. "So what if he did? It wouldn't really matter if we were in love with each other. We can't be together. I'm going to be his mentor for the next six years."

"You're right."

"So what do I do for now?"

"You just wait for the feelings to pass, if you know you won't ever be able to act on them."

Addison took a huge sip of wine. She would just ignore them. After all, it was bound to go away eventually.

Right?

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Alex turned around from the patients side just in time to see Addison walking away, her hair swaying behind her. _God, she is so beautiful-_

_Whoa. Did you just say beautiful?_ Alex pondered for a second. It was fine to admit his boss was hot (only a blind man would disagree) but _beautiful_?

He pushed the thought from his head. It had been a long day. He really needed to get some sleep. After comforting Heather a bit more, he left.

He walked into Joe's and spotted Meredith nursing her tequila. He sidled up to her.

"Hello, miss. Can I buy you a drink?" He asked mischievously.

Meredith turned around. "Sorry, I'm waiting for my—oh, Alex, it's you."

He plopped down next to her and ordered a beer. "What's wrong Meredith, I'm not inappropriate enough for you?" He teased.

"Well, actually you have been a good boy lately," she noted, as she downed her shot. "This is the first time I've seen you here in ages."

"Well, I've sort of…tried to turn a page in my book," he mumbled sheepishly. She snorted.

"Have fun with that. When was the last time you had sex?" She inquired, innocently enough.

_They were against the wall, and his thrusts became faster and harder. She was moaning, and her tongue, which had so many times before lashed out at him, was in his mouth, their hands, which had been by each other's in countless surgeries, were holding onto the other for dear life._

"Earth to Alex!" Meredith snapped impatiently.

"What were we talking about?" He snapped out of his trance. _It's normal I'm thinking about it, right? I mean, Meredith brought it up._

Meredith had the gleam of some knowing in her eye. She asked, carefully, "Who was it with?"

Alex briefly contemplated the easy 'some girl from Joe's' but Meredith wasn't a gossip, so he looked around, and said casually, " Addison."

Meredith spit her tequila onto the counter before her. "Holy shit…Oh my god…"

"What's wrong, Mer?" He thought it over. "Wait. Why did you ask in the first place?"

Meredith finally made eye contact with Alex, her eyes filled with sympathy and dread. "I saw your face when I mentioned the last time you had sex. And…I knew you still liked her. So…I asked who it was." Meredith looked scared, then downed another shot of tequila.

Though Alex wanted to deny it, everything started to fall into place. The sudden want to improve himself after the sex. The enormous disappointment when Addison sent him to plastics. The more-than-frequent strolls over to the Pediatric wing. The twinge he felt coming to work everyday that couldn't just be described as eagerness to work.

Alex reached over and stole Meredith's latest shot of tequila. "What do I do?"

"She had sex with you once, didn't she?" She asked, obviously taking some of the effects of her previous shots.

"That was months ago. And we've always had a sort of…sexual tension that comes from our fighting. We just kind of snapped one day. And we agreed to never talk about it."

Meredith sighed. "I guess all you can do is wait for the feelings to pass. She's your teacher. It would be seriously complicated."

"Yeah." Alex was pissed. Maybe they could have gotten together while he was on Plastics. They weren't even seeing each other at work, it wouldn't have had any affect on their professional lives. He slammed down his beer._ What did I use to do to make me feel better?_

He spotted a brunette in her mid twenties enter the bar by herself. With one last sip of beer, he patted Meredith on the back and headed over to get some free pain medication.

These feelings were going to pass, right?

------------

Alex awoke the next morning, his head throbbing, as well as his—

_Holy crap_, he thought, as he tried to wiggle out from underneath…_Katie? Lanie? Charlotte?_... and get feeling back in his body.

_This is why you can't be with Addison_, he was thinking as he hastily got dressed. He found his shirt finally in the kitchen. _She can't be with someone who has one night stands._ _She deserves some hot shot surgeon, not a crummy little manw.hore—more like boywhore—with a little crush on his mentor._ He drove to work, hoping his indiscretion wasn't showing all over his face.

-----------

Addison got to work the next morning, completely focused on plan "Ignore". Alex was an ass. By the end of the day, she would probably be mad at him again. After all, he was arrogant, and cocky, and a manwhore.

As soon as she saw him, she knew she wasn't going to be able to easily weasel herself out of the hole she dug. He was hunched over a chart, his forehead wrinkled in conversation, his shoulders upright, his chest-

_No, Addie. You aren't supposed to be thinking this way._

She walked up to him and said, casually she hoped, "What do we got today, Alex?" She didn't even notice she used his first name until she saw the look on his face. "Dr. Karev?" She fixed hastily, feeling like in that moment she put on a sign that said "LOOK AT ME, I HAVE FEELINGS FOR MY INTERN". She knew this was unreasonable, but nevertheless, her face was bright red.

"Not much. A woman came in last night after some spotting, so I scheduled a pelvic exam for later today," he replied. _She was so much prettier than his one night stand last night..._

_No, Alex. You have to stop those thoughts. You can't be together._

Both of their internal battles were interrupted when their pages went off. They sprinted down to the ER.

"Virginia Wendlick, in head on collision, 33 weeks pregnant. Open abdominal wound, BP dropped 2 minutes ago, yet to get back up. Husband on his way." The ambulance driver finished his round.

"Thanks," said Alex.

"What do you do?"

"Ultrasound to check baby's condition, abdominal CT to see where the wound punctured her peritoneal cavity."

"Good, Karev, let's move."

--------

"Dr. Karev, can you take the bovie and try to clear the surgical field?"

Alex stepped up to cauterize the bleeders. Suddenly, a rush of blood started to move.

"Damnit, I can't find the source of the bleeding," Addison swore.

Alex tried to look but it was hopeless. They were flying blind, and Virginia had minutes before she bled out and died.

Finally, Addison struck something. A small shard of her review mirror had gone through and completely severed one of her veins. She fixed it up, and the blood wasn't flowing freely any more, but she had already lost a lot.

Her heart beat wasn't coming back. "Come on, Virginia, you can do it…" Addison pleaded with the unconscious patient.

There was no hope. Addison nodded to Alex to call time of death.

"Ti-." Beep. Beep. Beep. "Holy…"

"We have a heartbeat," Addison announced to the shocked room. Applause from the OR was heard as she and Alex took out the baby and closed. They were still beaming as they were washing their hands.

"That was amazing," Alex blurted out.

"I know." Even Addison, who had been a surgeon for so many years, couldn't believe it. "She was dead."

"I know! She bled out!"

"Then she just came back to life!"

In the excitement of the moment, Alex and Addison had unintentionally drawn closer to each other. All of a sudden, they were kissing. Neither knew who leaned in first, but in a moment there they were, celebrating the life of one who they thought wouldn't return.

They pulled back, appalled. "Alex…" Addison looked like someone had run her puppy over.

"We can't, I know," Alex offered. She nodded. Alex turned and left. Addison collapsed on the floor, under the sink. So much for trying to let the feelings pass.

---------------

**The next update will take much longer [three or four days to get up, because I haven't written it yet. More reviews will make me inclined to write faster, but just warning you.**


	8. Chapter 8

**This chapter is a testimony to the fact that nice reviews make me more inclined to write. I haven't written anything for a week, but after reading the reviews, I wrote this. And I should be back to almost daily updates from now on. Thank you to my readers!**

**Bit of a cliffhanger at the end...just to warn you...**

---------------

Alex was sitting in an on call room, mulling over what had just happened.

What if he had ignored Addison? Thrown caution to the wind? Seduced her right on the floor under the sink?

He had to stop. He didn't deserve her. He just had had a one night stand the night before. Like hell they could be together. He might cheat on her. He wasn't polished.

And now they had to pretend like nothing had happened. They did it before when they first slept together. But that time there were no emotions attached. It had been a mistake, and they both knew it, and while it had been good, neither really wanted it to happen again.

But that kiss was 10 times more intense than even their sex all those months ago. They had grown on each other. It wasn't just sexual tension now…

Wait—he was assuming Addison wants him too. For all he knew, she just felt sorry for his school boy infatuation with her.

He needed to set things straight. If nothing else, even if he was lying through his teeth, he needed to make sure they were okay. That they could still be the mentor and the student. That he didn't work so hard to get on the neonatal specialty for nothing.

He had to talk to her.

--------------

Addison contemplated the situation. She had feelings for Alex Karev. Her intern. And they kissed. As they scrubbed out of surgery. So he most likely had feelings for her, too.

Which was very bad. Very, very, exceedingly, painfully, bad. Because he was Alex Karev. And she was Addison Montgomery. And he was her intern.

Right now, she felt so much more guilty than after they had had sex. Which was weird. They hadn't even skimmed second base, much less actually did each other, so why were they more vulnerable now?

_Because there are feelings attached now. Because now we've established that we like each other in more than just a "screw you" (in both meanings) way. There was actually something there._

For her, at least. Maybe she was the one that leaned in, and he responded because…well, because she was his boss.

_Stop it, Addie, you're going to drive yourself mad._

_Oh well_, she thought. _At least it can't get any worse than this, right?_

_Wrong. _Alex was walking towards her at full speed, and dragged her into an empty exam room.

--------------

"What do you want?" Addison asked him.

He stared at her. He just needed to say it. Get it over with. "I need to set things straight. About where we are. About what happened.

"We've been working together on and off for months now. We've saved people together, we've killed people together. We get on each other's nerves. We surprise each other when we don't. We are a team. A well oiled, flawed, complicated machine. Nothing more. It's easy to think that we are more, but that would just make things more difficult than they already are." He looked in her eyes.

"I know, Karev. I'm sorry about what happened. It was unprofessional, and I'm not sure what caused it. Spur of the moment excitement from the patient, probably. It's not going to happen again. We are fine."

_Thank god, she understood_. "You're my teacher."

"You're my student."

"Good. That's all I wanted to establish."

"Glad we're on the same page." They exited the room, and started making their way to their respective locker rooms. She called out, "Don't forget to study for the hysterectomy tomorrow morning."

He looked at her over his shoulder. "Don't worry Dr. Montgomery, I won't let you down."

-------------

Definitely the last thing she had expected him to do when she pulled her into the exam room.

She was grateful for it. He had put them in their rightful place. It was a bit shameful, really, that it was the subordinate that did it. That the older, wiser one in the mistake was the one that had to be dragged into the exam room.

But she was still grateful for it. It made things so much easier if she pretended she never felt anything at all in the first place. They could be normal again—which was her plan in the first place.

She was a little sad, though. What if Alex really meant what he said? What if, for him, it was just a little spur of the moment mistake?

_Why would it matter if he thought that?_ Addison scolded herself. _You aren't doing anything with him. You are going back to the normal teacher student relationship you had going on._

She would move on from this. All she needed was a little will power. Just because she had messed up today didn't mean she was doomed. She could do this.

--------

"Are you presenting, Dr. Karev?" Addison asked as she entered the room. Alex looked up.

"Kathleen Jones, 24, in for a hysterectomy after a needle biopsy showing malignant growths on her ovaries," Alex rattled off. He looked at the patient. She looked much younger than 24, with straightened blond hair, a tiny bit of eyeliner, and not over 5 foot 1.

"Ms. Jones, I'm Dr. Montgomery and I will be performing the surgery this morning. Dr. Karev, can you run pre-op labs?"

"Of course, Dr. Montgomery."

"Thank you, Dr. Karev." They may have kept eye contact a bit longer than necessary, but Alex didn't have a stop watch, so he ignored it.

Kathleen noticed it, though. She kept her mouth shut until Addison was out of the room.

She whistled. "Wow. I haven't seen such obvious eye-sex since high school," she said.

Alex cleared his throat, "Ms. Jones…"

"Kathleen," she insisted.

"Fine, Kathleen," Alex rebuked, putting unnecessary emphasis on her first name, "I will let you know that Addi—Dr. Montgomery and I, are strictly co-workers."

"That's what they all say," Kathleen said. "But could you give at least a few details? I'm losing my fertility this week, my hair the next week, and you can't even give the poor cancer patient a bit of conversation?"

Alex smiled. "There's nothing to tell. I'll talk to you about Dr. McDreamy— oh, but on second thought, that's your surgeon's ex-husband, so I better not."

Kathleen's eyes widened. "Oh, come on. You can't just bring that up and not tell me more." She started singing the well known song from "Grease".

Alex looked up. "You like musicals?"

"Only if you tell me about McDreamy and the Eye Sex."

"Trying to bargain with the surgeon now, are you?" Alex asked, trying to stay professional but not being able to hide his amusement.

Kathleen just stared at him long and hard, then suddenly backed down into a "dying cancer patient" pity facial expression.

"Fine, you win," Alex stuttered. "But I'll have to multi-task while taking your BP at the same time, so if I accidentally kill you, don't sue."

"I'm all ears."

-----------

"Suction, please."

Addison took the scalpel and started dissecting around the tumor.

"Do you think she's gonna make it?" Alex inquired. "I mean, she's only 24."

"If I can get as much of the tumor out as I think I can, with chemo she should make a full recovery," Addison answered, wondering at Alex's curiosity.

"That's good. That's really good. Did you know she likes Grease?"

Addison looked up. "Tell me more, tell me more."

Alex gawked. "You watch musicals, too?"

"I lived in New York City, what do you think I did on the weekends?"

"Right, sorry," Alex mumbled.

One of the scrub nurses inhaled deeply the smell of the OR, and exhaled. "Oh, what a beautiful morning, don't you think so Dr. Karev?"

"I met a girl named Maria at Joe's last night," commented the anesthesiologist.

Alex sighed, exasperated. "Okay, I bring up a tiny fact about the patient and all of a sudden everyone's making fun of me?"

Addison tried to say her next line with a straight face, but failed miserably. "Sorry, Dr. Karev. No good deed goes unpunished."

The entire OR burst into laughter, as Alex's face turned red, though under the protection of the surgical mask, but winked at Addison to show he took no offense.

"Dr. Karev, would you like to finish the procedure?" Addison offered.

Alex sighed, having finally switched topics. "I appreciate the opportunity, Dr. Montgomery." He took the scalper from Addison. Their hands touched a bit longer than what would have been a realistic brush, but no one else seemed to notice except for the two of them.

------------

"So, how come you aren't with your intern right now?" Kathleen asked Addison boldly as she woke up from the surgery.

Addison nearly dropped her stethoscope. "WHAT? I mean, what? Why would you ask that? What would give you the impression that I would be with him?" She bent down. "Did he say anything to you?"

Kathleen burst into laughter. "My God, you two are impossible. Why don't you just go there already?"

Addison responded from memory, like a machine, like she had been programmed to. "Because I'm his boss. And it would be completely unprofessional."

Kathleen sighed. "Whatev. I tried." She looked over at Addison's shoulder, and whispered, "Well, what's keeping you from going with him? He's been checking you out this entire time."

Addison turned around to see none other than Mark Sloane at the doorway, and she could tell from the look on his face he had heard all.

-------------

**You couldn't expect me to just forget about Mark, could you? Afterall, he is in Seattle because of Addison...**

**Until next time...;)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Okay, this took longer than usual to update. But it still only took two days. Which is very good compared to other fics. **

**READ THIS BEFORE YOU READ THE CHAPTER: This is an Addex fic. I am 100 Addex. But I needed to deal with this. And I like how I did it. So please read through the entire chapter keeping in mind that this is an Addex fic. And ALSO remember, this is suppose to be what COULD HAVE HAPPENED in Season 3, and Addison and Alex are at a lull right now. I think in my mind, this is about episode 3x20. If you request it, I will try to think out a plausible time line for the rest of the fic.**

**On with the chapter:**

_----------------_

_Kathleen sighed. "Whatev. I tried." She looked over at Addison's shoulder, and whispered, "Well, what's keeping you from going with him? He's been checking you out this entire time."_

_Addison turned around to see none other than Mark Sloane at the doorway, and she could tell from the look on his face he had heard all._

_-------------_

Addison exited Kathleen's room. She raised her eyebrows at Mark. He follows her to the other end of the hospital to find an empty on call room. When they are inside and the door is closed, she turns around and faces him. They are staring at each other, each refusing to break eye contact. Finally Mark can't hold it in anymore. "You and Karev? Seriously, Addison? You told me we couldn't be together because you needed some time to be alone! Now all of a sudden you're going after your intern?"

Addison was ready for this. "You don't know what the hell you're talking about. Karev and I are co-workers. I like him, he's a nice guy."

Mark scoffed. "Karev? He's just a miniature man whore. What the hell does he have that I don't?"

"Well, for one thing, he's just an intern, and already has better bedside manner than you. And he is on my service. I spend days with him at a time. Obviously I need to form some sort of friendship with him, otherwise we'd probably murder each other."

"You seriously think he joined neonatal because he all of a sudden didn't want to do Plastics and fell in love with a bunch of runny-nosed babies? He obviously has some sort of silly crush on you. And from your behavior back there, it looks like you return the feelings."

"Mark, listen to you. You know me. Can you picture me with an intern? I'm not someone who gets feelings for an intern, Mark. You know me better than that. What's this all about?"

Mark sighed. "I miss you, Addison. I sacrificed my best friend for you. And I left New York to come and fight for you. You can't just throw away all that history, can you?"

Addison knew it was wrong. She knew he had already worked his way through the nursing staff already, that he was just milking it because she was there, and she was hot, but he was also there, and he was also hot, and she was sad, because the guy she had feelings for wasn't there, and was her intern, and Mark was her own age. She could screw him all she wanted. And it wouldn't be complicated. So before she knew it they were going at it right there in the on call room. And the whole time, she knew it was wrong.

--------------

"Callie, what the hell am I going to do?" Addison wept to her friend. "He probably thinks we're in a relationship again or something."

Callie tried to say something to comfort Addison, but her reasoning skills had diminished considerably since the last shot of tequila. "Weeelllll…. You could pretend you were in a relationship with him, so you could have lots of sex with him…and then call it off when you find a real man. Win-win situation, huh?"

Even in her drunken state, Addison knew this was a bad idea. "No, that wouldn't be fair to him. Of course, it wasn't fair to seduce his married friend when she was obviously lonely and drunk, but that didn't stop him, did it? Ha, I'm funny."

Callie moaned. "Is it possible for your hangover to start before you stop drinking?"

Addison burped. "How long have we been at it? Holy sh1t, it's already 1 AM. I have a surgery tomorrow at…seleven…no, I mean seven. Actually, eleven, no…"

"Well, in that case, I think we should call it a night."

"Nooo," Addison whined, "I haven't decided what to do about Mark! You're supposed to be helping me, not telling me to sober up!"

Callie grunted. "Fine. Just tell him the truth. That it was a mistake, you are definitely not sleeping with him again, or starting a relationship with him, and he can go back to New York."

"Like he'll even listen to me," Addison noted.

"Make him. Tell him…heck, if you have to, get all gushy, tell him that if he really loved you, he would let you go, and let you start over, let you be with Alex…"

Addison mumbled her agreement. All of a sudden, she sat bolt upright. "WHAT did you say about Alex?"

Callie sighed. "Dammit. I hoped that had just been in my head."

"Never mind, I'll forgive you this time. I have a plan of action, and I will act on it, I will go to Mark, and I will tell him…wait, what's our plan again?" Confused, Addison looked over to Callie.

Callie just took Addison's bottle of alcohol and dumped it down the near by sink. "It's definitely time to go to bed."

------------

Addison got to work the next day with a huge hangover. _I'm never drinking again, ever again, no matter what the circumstances._ Even as she thought it, she knew she'd need to after her upcoming conversation. She took out her pager and paged Mark.

"Dr. Montgomery," Alex sidled up to her, handing her a chart. She dropped it as a wave of nausea came over her. "Whoa, what did you do this time?" Alex asked, before he had time to register what was coming out of his mouth.

Addison looked up. "Excuse me, Dr. Karev? What the hell do you mean by that?"

"Well, it looks like you have a hangover, which means you were drinking, and you usually don't drink unless something bad happened…" Alex mumbled sheepishly.

Addison looked over at him fondly. _He noticed that I wasn't feeling well—_

_No, Addison. You already have boy problems. Only one at a time._

"I'm fine, long day yesterday. Check up on the patient in room 1620," she replied curtly. She didn't have time for anything except the job and Mark today.

----------

"You paged me?" Mark sidled up to the nurse's station.

Addison put down the chart she was holding and took a deep breath. "Yeah. I need to talk to you about…things. Are you free right now?"

"I don't have a surgery for about 3 hours."

Addison sighed. "Good. Wanna go for a quick walk?"

Mark looked at her dubiously and raised an eyebrow. "Why don't we just skip the formalities? There's an empty on call room on the 2nd floor."

"No, Mark. I actually need to talk. It's something you do where you apply your brain to communicate with another human being."

"Fine, fine, let's 'talk'."

They went outside, and started walking around the hospital. It wasn't raining for once, but it was July. The air was comfortable, but Addison felt like it was suffocating her. It was easier when they were walking though, so she didn't have to look at him.

Addison opened her mouth, and let out an almost inaudible sound as she was about to say something, but closed her mouth at the last second. She wasn't sure how to word it. Mark was her best friend. Forget about the fact that he had ruined her marriage and they had had sex. He was her friend, and she knew she was about to break the heart of her friend, but she was the one in the driver's seat. She was the one who was about to make him miserable.

She opened her mouth again, but couldn't find the words. She didn't make a sound this time, because she had lost her voice.

Mark glanced at her, and realization dawned over his face like a brick had just been hurtled into his gut. With a strained voice, he said, "You aren't going to do anything with me. There is too much bad history, I missed my chance with you, if I really loved you I would move on and let you move on, too."

Addison stopped in her tracks. Her eyes filled with tears.

"How close was I?"

Addison mumbled, "You know me too well."

Mark forced a chuckle at Addison's feeble joke, but when it turned into the start of a sob, he closed his mouth.

She turned to face him. They looked at each other for a good, long time, before she finally took him in her arms and held him tight. Both of them stopped fighting the tears, as they wept for their friendship, their relationship, everything that had been sacrificed and thrown away because of their poor choices.

"Why did it have to get to this?" Mark mumbled into her hair, smelling her shampoo.

"I'm so sorry…we're idiots. I'm just so sorry." The shoulder of his shirt was soaking wet from her tears. "Oh, that night…if that night I hadn't had that extra shot of tequila, if you got paged into a surgery and didn't come over…"

"No," Mark said, his voice still breaking, but firm and believing in his words. "It was supposed to be like this. "Things happen for a reason. Why it had to ruin the unstoppable trio…I haven't got a fucking clue what God had his mind, cuz it seems like a lot of shit right now, but…Addie, you have to believe it happened for a reason. It happened so the three of us could get a fresh start."

The words did little to console Addison. "Remember the first day of our internship? When that baby Violet Beutler died? That's what Richard said. I remember you, and me, and Derek, were all so sad, and Richard came up to us and told us that if we were going to be surgeons, we needed to know that things happened for a reason."

Mark laughed a little. "Of course I remember. You didn't think I actually made up that load of crap myself, did you?"

She hugged him tighter. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too. But it really is time for a fresh start."

-------------

**Yes, that was incredibly Maddison. But I needed to get Mark out of the picture, because in my mind, I never pictured him staying as a season regular. And also, I will try and write A LOT today, because once Harry Potter is out, I won't be back until I'm done. However, if I do write alot today, I will come back for daily updates. Happy Harry Day!**


	10. Chapter 10

**I know it has been a while since I last updated. I actually finished Harry Potter on Saturday, but this chapter took a while to get out. Once again, this is supposed to be a Season 3 fanfic, and the Addex relationship is at a lull right now, so I need to deal with Addison's other men. This is [in my mind the fourth to last episode of the season, and I think the rest of my chapters will be an episode each which means this will be a... 14 chapter story? Maybe? I may divide it up more than that.**

**This chapter deals with Derek, because he is, afterall, our heroin's ex-husband. I did add some Addex in for good measure, because next chapter... well, you'll have to review and find out, won't you!**

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"Mark is gone."

Addison looked up from her desk. She had been in a trance, absentmindedly staring at a chart, so out of it she didn't notice when a dreamy neurosurgeon, who happened to be her ex-husband, entered her office and mentioned the man who had ended said marriage.

She recomposed herself. "Yes. Relieved, are you?"

"Yeah. He had no right to be here."

Addison rolled her eyes. "You are absolutely right, Derek. He has no business making any decisions by himself. How dare he even consider doing anything that would upset the order of his Royal Highness McDreamy?" The words came out of her mouth like they had been there for months, lurking until she let her guard down.

Derek stared at her, and scoffed. "You aren't still upset about the divorce, Addison, are you?"

Addison looked incredulously at him. "Aren't you? It was a third of our life, Derek."

"But I've moved on."

"No really, I didn't notice, I thought that was your evil twin groping an intern every five seconds." Where was this coming from? Addison never was like this.

Now it was Derek's turn to be disgusted with the other. "You know, Addison, if you are so sentimental about us being married now, how come you didn't bother to think about it as you jumped into bed with Mark?"

"I thought we were over Mark!"

"I thought we were over Meredith!"

They glared at each other in silence. Finally Addison spoke.

"Why did you come here?"

Derek responded immediately. "You slept with Mark again."

Addison looked at him suspiciously. "Do you have proof?"

"Just that which my own two eyes provided me with as you walked out of the on call room yesterday."

"Why do you care, Derek?"

"Because he is bad for you!"

At this Addison just down right laughed. "Oh, do you want to know what's bad for me? Getting a divorce wasn't exactly supposed to be a huge psychological relief. Finding a woman 9 years young than me's panties in the pocket of my husband's tuxedo? That really shortened my therapy bill. And being neglected for years before that by the same husband, who always had a surgery neatly scheduled every time I tried to set aside time to try and rekindle our marriage? But have him think the demise of the marriage was entirely my fault, for seeking comfort in the one person that gave a sh1t about me? Mark is bad for me, Derek, I get that, but he is only a fraction of how bad you are for me, so if you really cared about me Derek, gave a dam.n about how I feel, you would get your as$ out of my office right now!"

And there it was. Everything that had been building up for more than four years was finally put out on the table, in that little office in Seattle Grace Hospital, so many miles from where most of the turmoil had occurred.

And yet, Seattle witnessed the site of its final downfall. The concluding termination of NeglectedAddisonandWonderfulDerek.

Derek looked like someone had just slapped him. His face was whiter than it had been the day he and Addison went skiing, and he had brainlessly forgotten to wear a hat. His hair gel froze in his hair, and he had had to soak it in a warm bath for an hour to get it all thawed out.

But now, the woman who had kept him company in that very bath tub was the one causing his complexion to go white.

He turned and left the office before Addison could see the effect her words had on him; the last in a long line of leaving before the going got rough, and she was once again in the dark that he actually cared.

--------------

Addison entered her patient's room 15 minutes later. She felt like she could have stayed in her office forever, but she had gotten paged. "What's wrong, Karev?"

"Virginia Harvard, 32, was in normal labor when her BP started to go up."

Addison groaned. She had been pulled from her sanctuary for this? "Don't you know how to lower a BP, Dr. Karev?"

He was taken aback by her harsh tone and words. With as much dislike and attitude and sarcasm he could muster, he responded, "I've already tried everything, Dr. Montgomery. I was wondering if you had any suggestions."

She so was not in the mood for cocky interns right now. "Nurse, please administer Mrs. Harvard 3 cc's of yobarapime, and page me if her BP doesn't lower." She left the room, rubbing her temples. She needed a couple shots of caffeine…or tequila, for that matter.

She was so out of it, Addison didn't even notice Alex was following her until they were in the stair case. And she couldn't very well go get drunk with him following her.

"What are you doing?" She demanded of him.

"What's your problem?" He shot back.

Addison clenched her fists. "What do you mean, what's my problem? I'm fine. You're the one who won't get off my back."

"What were you doing back there?"

"Nothing!" She turned and started to walk up the stairs, but he grabbed her arm.

"No, not nothing. You don't act like this. Something's wrong, but I can't tell what it is, and it's frustrating me because you're Addison, and I don't like the idea something could be wrong with you. And sometimes talking about it can help, and I hope it will because I forgot to tell you that you're supposed to be in surgery in 30 minutes."

Alex kept looking at her. He thought he had done a really good job, telling her he cares, that he would listen, but keeping it professional and keeping himself guarded. But Addison still couldn't come up with a response.

Finally, she spoke. "Mark left for New York this morning, I'm feeling guilty, Derek found out, blamed me, we got into a fight, he walked out, the coffee cart messed up and gave me a decaf, so I don't have any caffeine in my system, and next time tell me before you schedule a surgery or you won't scrub in for a month."

And with that she walked up the remaining stairs and went through the door, her crimson hair swishing behind her, and Alex thanked his lucky stars once again he ever had the chance to be with her at all, even if it was just for 15 minutes in a room probably smaller than her walk-in closet.

-----------

Alex slumped down noisily at the intern's lunch table, and started to grumpily devour his sandwich. He didn't notice that everyone had stopped talking, until the silence was broken with Cristina's "What the hell is your problem?"

Alex was about to open his mouth and let all spill, but then remembered Addison had trusted him to keep her problem private, not to mention her problem's girlfriend was sitting at the table.

"Nothing, I'm just tired. The She-ExSheperd is working my as$ off." That answer seemed to satisfy three of his fellow interns, but one glance at Meredith showed she didn't buy a word of it. Alex painfully remembered the night at Joe's with her, and that she knew about his feelings for Addison. Except there weren't feelings. Alex himself was the one to set straight the fact that they were simply co workers.

Meredith purposely stuck around until the other interns were gone before confronting him. "Anything you want to tell me, Alex?"

"No, but I have a feeling that won't stop you from nagging me until I crack and just tell you."

Meredith rolled her eyes, but didn't deny the words. "Is it about Addison?"

"Yeah…" He really didn't want to betray her trust, but Meredith was putting on her face, so he couldn't really refuse. "She and Derek got in a big fight."

Meredith raised her eye brows. "And this bothers you because…?"

"Because it got her into a bad mood, and I'm around her 15 hours a day, so she's being annoying to me, and now I'm in a crappy mood!" There. That was pretty innocent. Maybe Meredith could drop it now.

But he had no such luck. "See, that actually sounds pretty plausible, except for the fact that I'm Derek's girlfriend and I don't know about it, but somehow you found out about the fight."

"That's probably because he didn't want to brag about it, considering what they were fighting about."

"Why, what were they fighting about?"

"Them! Their marriage! I think they haven't really talked since the divorce, and now they just finally let it all out. Also, the fact that Mark left probably didn't do much to help. Shepherd probably went in to gloat about it to Addison that she couldn't keep a relationship with him, and how she threw away their marriage, but he didn't care anymore because he already had moved on. I mean, God Forbid she be sad that the past 11 years all went to waste."

Alex didn't really realize the effect of his rant on Meredith and went back to eating his sandwich.

----------

"Derek!" Meredith stormed up to her boyfriend.

"Hey. You look annoyed. Want cheering up?"

"No! I need to speak with you."

She dragged Derek into an on call room. He looked confused, until Meredith finally said, "What happened with you and Addison this morning?"

Derek rolled his eyes, and sighed in relief. "I went in to have a perfectly civil conversation about Mark leaving—."

"Since when are you civil with anything that has to do with Mark?"

"And then she started talking about you, and getting all sentimental about our marriage. It was completely ridiculous. That was months ago! Why hasn't she just moved on already?"

Meredith looked at her boyfriend in disbelief. "Excuse me? She has every right to be sentimental! You were married for 11 years! One of the reasons I was going to pick Finn was because I didn't want to wait around a year or two for you to get over your marriage, but then all of a sudden—."

"I realized I couldn't sulk around in the past, and I needed to move forward with my life. I didn't want to waste even more time in a period of grief where Addison and I were fighting!"

"Derek, at least go apologize. Please. Please." She pulled out her face that she knew he couldn't resist.

He conceded. "Fine, I don't know what I'm apologizing for, though."

Derek went off to find Addison, but his last statement was a lie.

----------------------

He found her at Joe's. Derek quickly counted, and saw that she had only had one shot, so she was sober enough to have a civil conversation.

He walked up behind Addison. "Double scotch, single malt," he requested to Joe.

Addison looked up. "Being divorced means you can't pick me up at a bar anymore, Derek."

"I'm not picking you up. I have a girlfriend." This wasn't beginning how he wanted it to.

Addison responded to this by ordering another shot of vodka. Derek pushed it away from her. "I need to talk to you. And I want you to be able to remember it tomorrow."

"I thought we already said everything."

"No, we haven't." He took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I don't think I've apologized to you at all in the past year, but you've deserved it for a while now. I'm not sorry about what happened, and you sleeping with Mark, and all of that. Without that, I wouldn't have come here and gotten a fresh start." She noticed how he said "Fresh start" instead of "Meredith". "But I'm sorry that you got hurt in the process. I'm sorry I pushed you to the point where you thought the only way to get attention was to cheat on me. I'm sorry about being absent, and not seeing you, and I'm sorry about the panties, and prom, and… I'm sorry it took so long to say I'm sorry."

Addison looked up at him, and they looked each other in the eye for a minute or two. Addison finally broke the solemn silence with, "Are you sure I only had one shot of vodka?"

Derek laughed, and gave back Addison's drink. She downed it without flinching.

After she had the fresh alcohol in her veins, she said, "Thank you for that. I'm sorry I never bothered to talk to you about what was bothering me. I'm sorry about Mark. I'm sorry that I hurt you."

Derek smiled. "Thanks."

Addison downed another shot. "Alright, that's enough apologies for me for another decade or so."

"Why did I have a hunch you were going to say that, Satan?"

-------------

**I know it took almost a week to get this chapter up after you got used to daily updates, but I am going camping tomorrow, which means I won't be able to update until at least Monday. And it may be much later than that. I am bringing this with me, so I may finish the whole fic while I'm away and come back with daily updates until I am done, or I may not write at all and the next chapter will take another week to get up like this one did. Who knows. But I expect to have a nice bunch of reviews to read when I get home!**


	11. Chapter 11

**I know it has been forever since I have updated. But I came home from vacation, and I only had a few reviews, and I was doing other stuff, and I was uninspired. So, since it is been a while, I thought I'd do a little synopisis of what has happened.**

**Addison and Alex slept together, and agreed to never talk about it again.**

**Addison let Alex go into Plastics.**

**Mark was a bastard to Alex, so Addison helped Alex poison him.**

**Alex is punished by going back to Addison for a month.**

**After he goes to plastics after his punishment, he realizes he really wants to do neonatal, and Addison let's him back.**

**After a few days, Addison and Alex both discover that they have feelings for eachother, but won't act on them.**

**After they work on a patient, they start making out, but they stop.**

**They agree that nothing happened, it was a spur of the moment thing.**

**Addison and Mark sleep together, but Addison lets Mark go, and he moves back to New York.**

**Addison and Derek put closure on their relationship after a fight.**

**So alot has happened! I decided to cut a whole portion out of my fic, because it isn't writing itself like it used to. So this is either the second to last or third to last update. And in my world, this is the pre-finale update. So it sets up the drama, and cliffhangers, and then next up is the finale. And as you know, finales always have EVERYTHING happen. Like people dying, and relationships torn and... exam room sex? Maybe... but you'll have to read to find out!**

**------------------------**

Alex sidled up behind Add_- Dr.__ Montgomery_, and placed a non fat tall mocha latte with an extra shot in front of her. "What do we got today, Doc?"

Addison looked over at him. "Did you just call me Doc? Do I look like someone who enjoys getting called Doc, Karev? _Do I look very 'Doccy' to you?_"

Alex, unfazed by her outrage, merely patted her back, and pushed the latte closer to her. "I think it's time for _DOC_tor Montgomery to get her caffeine."

Addison hit him with the chart, then handed it to him and took a sip of her coffee. "There was a car crash, a woman with a fragile cervix from sexual abuse was in it. We just want to make sure she didn't sustain any damage. What should we do?" 

"Pelvic exam, ultrasound, and she should probably stay overnight for observation." Alex looked at the woman's films from previous appointments. "I wonder who the hell did this to her."

Addison peered over his shoulder. "Wow." She noticed Alex's face looked weird. "What's wrong?"

"I haven't seen films this bad since…" Alex cut himself off just in time. It was bad enough that Izzie knew about his past. He didn't want Addison to know. He hated people pitying him. It was in his past.

"What?" Addison could see his thought process going on, but had no idea what it was about.

"Nothing, just some case…" Alex finished. He looked closer. These films looked really familiar. What if it was—_no, that would be impossible_. But he couldn't help but wonder.

Addison knew something was wrong, but decided to drop it. He could tell her if he wanted to.

They approached the room, Addison in front, Alex behind her, like it always was. "What's the patient's name?" She opened the door, and saw the woman lying on the bed. Her face looked strangely familiar. Maybe Addison had seen her before… but she usually remembers her patients. "Karev? Name?"

At the sound of 'Karev', the woman jolted her head towards them. Her eyes widened at something above Addison's shoulder.

She heard a clang behind her. By the time she turned around, Alex was nowhere to be seen. The chart was on the floor. She picked it up, and looked at it.

_Gretchen Karev, 52. _

---------------------------------------

"So, you're…" Addison stared at the woman in front of her. Now she knew why she recognized her face—she had his nose, and eyes. The most wonderful eyes…

"My son and I haven't spoken in 7 years," Gretchen said. "I didn't know he was in Seattle."

"He is one of our finest interns at Seattle Grace."

Gretchen chuckled. "He's been practicing to be a plastic surgeon since he was fourteen."

"Actually, he is specializing in prenatal care, and OB/GYN."

She raised her eyebrow. "Really? God knows he likes vaginas, as I'm sure you've figured out—."

_As soon as the rest of there clothes were scattered on the floor, he expertly guided his fingers into her, going right _there_. She gasped, and kissed him harder, as he continued to explore her. I guess this is a learning experience, Addison thought. "You certainly know your anatomy, Dr. Karev," she whispered, as she returned the favor to him, hearing him groan in pleasure. _

"Right," Addison cut off his mother, as she felt her cheeks redden. "I will have a talk with him, but I assume you won't want him on your case?" 

Gretchen shook her head. "But ask him if he'll come see me…talk to me."

Addison nodded, and left the room, her face still burning from the memory. She had to get all these unprofessional thoughts of her intern out of her head. As she contemplated where he might have gone—Bathroom? Bar?—she realized she already knew the answer.

---------------

Baby Lucy was the infant who got the pleasure of being Alex's vault.

Addison walked up behind him and snatched her chart out of his hands. As she looked at it, she asked, "Do you want to tell me the story?"

Alex sighed. He wanted to, he just… "No," he mumbled guiltily. "Nothing personal—."

"I get it," Addison brushed off. "Well, you aren't on her case anymore, so I'm giving you 30 minutes, then you can attend to Ms. Wasson in 2815."

"Thank you, Addison." Neither noticed the subtle use of her first name.

Addison turned to leave. When she was in the doorway, she turned to him. "Whatever happened, she wants to see you. And she knows you extremely well. Well, she knows what you were before. And if I were you, I would want to show her what you've become."

----------------

He spent the rest of his thirty minutes in the NICU, debating whether he should see his mother. New Alex was telling him of course he should, she's his mother, alot has happened in 7 years, it's bad to hold a grudge…

But along with the memories of what had happened, also came the Old Alex who had witnessed it.

_"He's really gone isn't he?" _

_Alex and his mom were sitting in the waiting room at the hospital. She had made him wear gloves to hide the bruises on his knuckles, much like his father did when it was her in here with the injuries. _

_The doctor looked confused. "He filled out his own discharge forms, told us you were waiting at outside with the car. There might have been a miscommunication about…" _

_"No, he's gone." Alex was done with making excuses for him. This time, he was going to face the facts straight on. _

_The doctor opened his mouth to say something else, but Alex shook his head. "Thank you for informing us." He used a tone of finality in his voice to inform the doctor that they were done speaking to him. He nodded curtly and walked away. _

_Alex intertwined his fingers with Gretchen's. They just sat there. No words were needed. Well, none were good enough to fulfill what they needed, so they decided it was better not to try at all, and instead succumbed to the silence. _

------------------

Alex sat down at the intern's table in the cafeteria.

"…Derek's is bigger than Burke's, Cristina, I get better—."

Alex spit out his water. "You'd think I'd be used to hearing conversations like this while being around you…"

Cristina scoffed, unfazed, while Meredith became flustered. "We were talking about…salaries! Neurosurgeons are paid more than cardiothoracic surgeons! Right, Cristina?"

"Hey, Alex, where have you been today? I haven't seen you around, do you have any good cases?" Izzie chimed in, thankful for the diversion from the previous discussion topic.

"Not really…" Alex omitted the fact of his life-bearer's appearance to his peers.

"That's too bad. I get to scrub in on an appendectomy this afternoon."

"Don't wip da secum!" Bit's of sandwich flew across the table as George gave his advice.

"Bambi, Iz is more competent than you, keep your sandwich to yourself," Alex grumbled.

He noticed Cristina and Meredith had entered a little whispering relay. "What's so interesting, crack whore?"

"Meredith and I were just discussing how Shepherd and Burke probably both have 'higher salaries' than you."

-----------------------------

Alex paced in the on call room. Should he visit his mother? Of course he should. She's her mother. Time to put the past behind him. He should see her, talk to her, catch up, stuff like that. That is what a good person would do. He had become a good person, right?

No.

_Yes. _

No.

_Stop it. _

You're not.

_But I am! _

That's what you want to think.

_You know what? I'm going to prove I am. _

How?

Alex stormed out of the on call room, and ran smack dab into Addison, knocking her into a counter. She stepped back in pain, rubbing her forehead. But Alex didn't so much as apologize before spluttering, "Which room is she in?"

"Room 2215—."

"Thank you!" Without thinking, he grabbed Addison's head, and where he had run into it planted a gentle kiss before running off.

-----------------------------------------------

"Whenever you're working with Cristina does she ever kiss your forehead?"

Callie didn't even look up from her chart. "Do you need to have a little talk with Preston, Addie?"

"No, but I'm having some intern problems."

Callie looked up this time. "Tell all. Did you sleep with him again?"

"No!" Addison looked around, making sure no one was around. Thankfully, the only person in their vicinity was Gretchen's sleeping figure a few doors down. "But… things have been weird."

"What kind of weird?"

Addison sighed. "I really shouldn't be having this conversation. Besides, Alex should be acting weird today. His apparently estranged mother is in tow today."

"Really?"

"Yup. Looks like she was abused a few years back…" Addison's eyes widened. She dropped her chart, and charged off in the other direction.

Callie looked at her with a weird face. "Nice talking to you."

--------------------------

Addison looked down at the medical records in her hands.

_Gretchen Karev, films taken 13 years ago. _

She did the math. Alex is 30. 13 years ago was when he was 17. He was there when it happened.

But the films showed evidence that it happened over a long period of time, starting maybe even 10 years before she finally came in for a checkup.

The puzzle pieces came together when Addison realized that her husband wasn't there.

Addison realized she needed to push this thought from her mind, as she picked up the recent films and let out a low groan.

----------------------------------------

"Sorry about before," Alex mumbled halfheartedly to his mother.

"I wasn't aware I looked that bad. Do you think I should bring my make up bag in here?"

He chuckled. She hadn't changed. She had, but… how can you not?

"Umm… yeah… so…"

"Start with med school," Gretchen interrupted his fillers.

"I got through, surprisingly. Not exactly top of class, but I made it, which counts for something, right?"

"Then you came here…"

"I figured I could identify with the weather in Seattle if nothing else."

"And you became a gynecologist."

"No," Alex quickly denied, but realized there wasn't really a point. "Well, yeah, but…"

"Actually, the more I think about it, the more it seems like something you would do well. But what made you try it out in the first place?"

"I back-talked Addison."

" Addison?"

"Dr. Montgomery, yeah. So she stuck me on a case as punishment, because she knew it would be torture enough."

"Feisty. Just how you like them. When did you sleep with her?"

"What? What do you… how do you…"

"Come on, answer the damn question already."

Alex sighed. "A few months ago."

She nodded, amused. "When are you planning to do it again?"

He gawked. "What? She's—she's my boss, mom."

"Has that stopped you before?"

"No… but—."

"Whatever."

Alex turned to go. He had his hand on the door handle when he turned around. "Mom?"

"Yeah, hun?"

"Nice seeing you."

"You too. Call sometime?"

"Definitely."

He opened the door and once again bumped into Addison, though less forcefully this time.

"I'm having a little bout of déjà vu," Alex teased, but saw her face, which had no hint of play on it. "Dr. Montgomery… no offense but you look like someone just skinned your puppy. You don't seem like much of a dog person." Still no response, but suddenly tears sprang to her eyes as she watched Alex. " Addison, what's wrong?"

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	12. Chapter 12

**Well, no one guessed what was wrong with Addison, even though it practically told you. I'm very disappointed.**

**Actually, scratch that. I'm absolutely ECSTATIC because I got 9 reviews. Which isn't alot by most people's standards, but that's the most I've ever gotten on any fic, including my Addex porn fic! So thank you to everyone who reviewed.**

**I'm sorry this took so long-- I told myself I'd update in two days, but I lost my muse. Thankfully, it came back last night while I was watching a show about the Dixie Chicks.**

**Okay, two things about this chapter: 1. Since I decided to shorten my fic, last chapter was the pre-finale episode setting up the drama (ie: 17 Seconds). And this is Part I of the finale. The SEASON FINALE. And next chapter will be Part II. I may post Part II in two parts. Haven't decided yet.**

**ALSO, when I posted this on Grey's Anatomy Message Boards, I put it under the name "How We Operate", so I had to do something with that song. So I loosely incorporated it with this chapter. It doesn't really enhance the reading, but they correspond surpisingly accurately with the text.**

**Anyhoo, I think I want to hit 100 reviews by the time I finish this fic (which is going to be 13 or 14 chapters.) If I go over 105, I'll write a sequel. So endulge me.**

**------------------------------------------------------------------**

"The car crash served extensive damage to your lower abdomen, causing some internal bleeding. Though at first the bleeding was small, and should have resolved on its own, because of your ovaries', umm… damaged state…"

Alex let go of Gretchen's hand and strode over to Addison, and before she could protest, snatched the CT results from her hand. He shouldn't have done that. He jerked back violently when he saw the image in front of him, almost tripping over the end of his mother's bed. Addison instinctively grabbed his hand, lightly massaging the palm with her thumb.

It worked. Alex took a deep breath and calmly handed back the scans to the surgeon, and turned back his mom. Gretchen was obviously more interested in the moment that occurred between Alex and Addison than _why_ they were acting that way.

"Mom, your entire ovary collapsed."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Addison and Alex exited the room together, silent. The nurses around them noticed the absence of the usual flirtatious banter, and started whispering their theories. They were silenced, and questions answered, when Addison told Debbie to schedule an emergency opherectomy/ hysterectomy in two hours for Karev, Gretchen.

Alex veered off from Addison when she stopped at the nurses' station, heading for an on-call room. The shock had worn off, but still it was his mom. And what was that moment between him and Addison? They had agreed that there was nothing there, nothing to do; they had already said everything to each other, done everything to each other. So what was going on?

He was too caught up in his internal battle with Addison to actually notice her follow him into the room. It wasn't until he heard the click of a lock behind him that signified that the door was locked and they were the only ones in the room with no one to stop them, that he knew she was there, back against the door, staring him down with her pure green eyes.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alex takes one look at her. Watching her stand there, smiling softly at him, smiling softly because of him, he pushes New Alex, Old Alex, Professionalism, Lines, Agreements, and Sanity to the back of his mind, strides over to Addison—

_Please come here  
Come right on over  
There is no line that you can't step right over _

"Thanks."

He kisses her.

Full on the lips.

Tongues battling.

Hands in hair.

Moaning against each other's mouths.

Complete, utter, pent up, long time coming, FINALLY, kissing.

And if there was ever such a thing as kissing back, Addison was doing a hell of a good job of it.

_Turn me inside out and upside down  
And try to see things my way_

He brought his hands to the back of her neck, supporting the base of her head, as his tongue delved deeper into her inviting mouth, exploring what he had tasted before, but hadn't appreciated to the fullest at the time.

_Turn a new page, tear the old one out  
And I'll try to see things your way_

Her arms were around his waist, stroking his sides. She had done the same to him without clothing, but he seemed richer now, months later, when it meant more.

Both were doing it slow. So incredibly, sensually slow it would be boring, but nothing about the situation wasn't exciting and new.

Alex was thanking the almighty lord above that she had locked the door and no one could burst their bubble when their pagers went off.

They both would have ignored them if it hadn't been a 911 for Gretchen Karev.

_When we collide, we'll see what gets left over_

--------------------------------------------------------------------

"What the hell happened?" Alex exclaimed as he rushed to his mother's room, only to find her already being wheeled out on a gurney.

Debby looked up. "She's unstable, her second ovary may have collapsed. She's losing blood fast. We need an OR now."

"Come on, people, let's go!" Addison directed as she headed to the scrub room. Her lips, which a few seconds prior had been deep and lush, were slowly fading into their normal beauty, but Alex's heart couldn't help but miss his contact with them.

_Wherever you lead, I'll follow _

He followed her into the scrub room, but before he could say anything—"You're not scrubbing in."

_The way that we've been speaking now  
I swear that we'd be friends, I swear _

He scowled. " Addison—."

"Dr. Karev. That is your mother. I won't have you in my OR." Addison glanced over to him, noticing the hurt. Her eyes, steely with professionalism, softened for a moment. He may have imagined it, because a final "Karev" was out of her mouth, and she already was washing her hands.

By the time she was done washing them, all of the scent of Alex, the smell of his scrub shirt, the hint of his cologne, would be swirling down the drain.

_Without you, well I'm left hollow  
So can we decide to try a little joy tomorrow_

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alex managed to catch his mom before she was wheeled into the OR. She reached out and grabbed his hand. "Honey?"

"Yeah, Mom?"

"If I die—." The anesthesiologist was ready—"Go after your boss for me, won't you?"

Alex burst out laughing, and hastily agreed as she left consciousness, and he ran from the room the room chuckling, until he was in a storage closet where the mirth had become sobs, as the woman he loved tried to save the life of his mother.

Wait—what did he just say?"

_Turn me inside out and upside down  
And try to see things my way  
Turn a new page, tear the old one out  
And I'll try to see things your way_

And I'm gonna love you anyway 

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**Review for a quick update!**


	13. Chapter 13

**You guys absolutely baffle me. I got 4 reviews on chapter 10 which is what made me go AWOL for a while, and last chapter I got over 16! We are at 89 reviews, which is absolutely amazing. So I know if everyone keeps reviewing, it will easily reach 105. So I'm bumping it to 115. Sorry. But my first day of school was yesterday, and I'm BUSY! And that still will be easy if all you lurkers come out and review. I have anonymous reviews enabled. So anyways, enjoy the chapter. One more to go!**

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"Hang another unit of A positive," Addison ordered from her perch above Gretchen. She had been going at this for two hours, but the bleeding kept coming back.

"More retraction, please." Debby came up and retracted more, letting out a low whistle.

The damage was one thing to see from the CT, but looking down into her body cavity, Addison got an idea of just how bad Gretchen's husband had been to her. "Wow…" she said quietly.

_Dammit, this would be a perfect teaching moment_, she lamented. "Can someone page Stevens to scrub in?"

"Yes, Dr."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"You requested me, Dr. Montgomery?" Addison could hear her smile bouncing across her face across the OR even as she was attempting to stop her (boyfriend's? Intern's? Lover's?) mother from bleeding out on her table.

"Yes. Stevens, I needed an intern."

Izzie looked confused. "What about Dr. Karev?"

"Alex couldn't scrub in on this one because—." She stopped herself just in time. Who knew if he wanted the world to know he had an abusive father and a mother in mortal peril? "Alex couldn't scrub in."

_Oh crap, did I just call him by his first name in front of his ex-girlfriend? _

The blonde looked curious, but didn't ask more about why he wasn't there. Instead she asked something else, quietly, so that just Addison could hear.

"How long have you two been seeing each other?

Addison nearly dropped her scalpel, then considered throwing it at Izzie. "What are you—."

"This isn't the first time someone has asked you that, is it?" Addison's face betrayed her, and Izzie won that round.

However, the blonde's verbal diarrhea stopped their. Which was good. Because Addison didn't have time for nonsense. She needed to finish this surgery successfully, and be able to report to Alex that Gretchen was okay.

Because killing a guy's mother? Not the best way to win his heart.

Oh god, why on earth was she thinking these thoughts? "Win his heart"? What a load of complete bull shit.

She felt compelled to say something more. "But we aren't. We aren't anything. In any way, shape, or form." _Until today, at least. But even that sounds wrong—_

_- _

_"Crap. I cannot even believe.." _

_"Aww. It wasn't that bad, was it?" _

-

_"So what I'm trying to say is- Old Alex was a plastics guy. But New Alex, the guy I'm trying to be, the better man…" _

-

_"Tell me I'm hallucinating?" _

_"Holy-." _

_"What?!" _

_"You have feelings for him." _

-

_"Don't forget to study for the hysterectomy tomorrow morning." _

_"Don't worry Dr. Montgomery, I won't let you down." _

-

_"No, not nothing. You don't act like this. Something's wrong, but I can't tell what it is, and it's frustrating me because you're Addison, and I don't like the idea something could be wrong with you. And sometimes talking about it can help." _

-

_He kisses her. _

_Full on the lips. _

_Tongues battling. _

_Hands in hair. _

_Moaning against each other's mouths. _

_Complete, utter, pent up, long time coming, FINALLY, kissing. _

_- _

It wasn't just "until today", was it? Had they just been building up their relationship ever since they had sex? They had started at the end. But somehow had managed to work their way back from the beginning this time.

Those moments, their interactions, the longer than normal hand brushes; outrageous, obvious, yet oh so innocent flirting; the lapse of judgment in the scrub room; him comforting her for Derek, her comforting him for Gretchen; non-stop working and contact for the past few months.

_"We've been working together on and off for months now. We've saved people together, we've killed people together. We get on each other's nerves. We surprise each other when we don't. We are a team. A well oiled, flawed, complicated machine. Nothing more. It's easy to think that we are more, but that would just make things more difficult than they already are." _

But they _were_ more. It was obvious now, looking back, that there was something more.

And like hell it was making things more complicated, considering Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery just discovered she was in love with her intern while she wrapped up a successful hysterectomy.

_Successful hysterectomy_. She hadn't even been paying attention to what she was doing, but Gretchen Karev was being rolled out of the room this minute. Addison sighed. Gretchen would live.

But could Addison live, now that she knew what she should've all along?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_He was dressing to get ready to go to his mother's funeral, when Addison came out of the shower (naked, of course). He kept trying to seduce her, but she pushed him away. "God, Karev, you're such a boy. Get your impulses under control," as she walked around his room naked. _

_So he got on his tuxedo, but as he was fixing his tie, Addison came over (still naked), and said that he was doing it wrong. "Derek knew how to put on a tie…" she mumbled. "Why aren't you mature like him and Mark? You're just a little kid." _

_Then she got her purse and started taking out and counting all of her bills. "Let's see, 20, 120, 170, 270…" And he tried to hide the leftover spaghetti he scrounged from the hospital a few days ago to eat for dinner. _

Alex woke up sweating profusely, unable to think. What the fucking hell had that been about?

Alex knew he should get more sleep, but he was afraid of going back to his nightmare. He was saved when his pager went off an hour later.

It was from her. Which meant that the surgery was over. She was either alive, or she wasn't. But he wasn't really that freaked out. I mean, he'd lived without her for the past 7 years, so it wouldn't really make a difference in his life, would it?

Then he remembered his promise. If she was dead, he would have to go after Addison. He already did, earlier. But what was that? Was that nothing now? Were they going to pretend that it had never happened? Were they together now?

He was saved having to answer this question when he approached his mom's room, ready for anything, everything, and nothing. She was lying in her bed, and he couldn't tell what happened, where she was dead, or—

"Just sleeping," Addison said quietly from a chair doing post-op nots, and then he could hear the beeping of the machines in the room indicating that yes, she was going to wake up. He let out the breath he had been holding.

Gretchen started to stir, and Addison left. As she walked past him, their eyes met. What was going to happen? Did this overshadow the previous events? What had changed?

Alex couldn't bring himself to face those questions at the moment, so he gave a small smile and proceeded to his mother's bed. Addison sighed, and left the room.

Gretchen looked up at her son. "Is it wrong that I was kinda hoping I was dead so I would be able to watch you and Addison get together?"

Alex snorted. "Yeah, sorry about that, I'll make sure to inform the surgeon to let you die next time.

She looked up at him. "You aren't going to let her go, are you?"

"You think I should?"

"Do you want to?"

"Yes." It was out of his mouth before he could stop it. Hearing it, he was startled. "But it's so impossible. She's Addison Forbes Montgomery, I'm Alex Karev. How could it ever work?"

"Nothing worth fighting for is ever easy—."

"Oh, shut the hell up."

Gretchen looked like she had been slapped. Alex looked just as shocked. "Mom—."

"It's okay," she lied.

They were silent for a few minutes. Then, quietly, "What if I do it to her? What if I end up just as bad him? What if I'm not ready, even though she is? What if I can't handle all of her history, and I end up just one more on the list of men who hurt her?"

"Alex, you have control over each and every one of those things. And you were planning to go after her if I had died."

"Well, yeah, but—."

"Now it means more. If you go after her now, it means it isn't out of an unfulfilled wish from a parent. It's because you love her."

Alex's pager (_fuckyou_) chose to go off then. He exited the room, marveling at was his mom had said… he had been thinking it before, but hearing it out loud sort of clarified it. It was inevitable, really. And it didn't just start today.

-

_"Crap. I cannot even believe…" _

_"Aww. It wasn't that bad, was it?" _

-

_"You've been doing really well. Great, even." _

_"I've been working on it. I want to improve." _

-

_"I saw your face when I mentioned the last time you had sex. And…I knew you still liked her. So…I asked who it was." _

-

_"Don't forget to study for the hysterectomy tomorrow morning." _

_"Don't worry Dr. Montgomery, I won't let you down." _

-

_"No, not nothing. You don't act like this. Something's wrong, but I can't tell what it is, and it's frustrating me because you're Addison, and I don't like the idea something could be wrong with you. And sometimes talking about it can help." _

-

_He kisses her. _

_Full on the lips. _

_Tongues battling. _

_Hands in hair. _

_Moaning against each other's mouths. _

_Complete, utter, pent up, long time coming, FINALLY, kissing. _

_- _

Then he remembered, in a painful memory…

_"We've been working together on and off for months now. We've saved people together, we've killed people together. We get on each other's nerves. We surprise each other when we don't. We are a team. A well oiled, flawed, complicated machine. Nothing more. It's easy to think that we are more, but that would just make things more difficult than they already are." _

Yes, this was infinitely more complicated. But his mom was right, in her clichéd glory. Nothing worth fighting for was ever easy. It wasn't going to be easy… but it sure as hell had to happen. Because Alex knew all too well, he didn't fall in love with a person every day.

He finished his shift with this resolve in his head, and the second the minute hand struck 8, he was out of there, almost sprinting to the attendings' locker room.

But no one was there. Alex was in a room all alone once again, and Addison was gone.

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**Now, a little hint of foreshadowing here, and a clue to the reader: Pay attention to that last line. And Addison will pay for making Addison wait, but not the way you would expect. Until next time! Review, review, review!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Well, last chapter... so sad, I know! I think that it turned out pretty well for my first fanfic... a slow start, but I did get alot more reviews at the end, so that's good! We still have a bit of a ways to go to get 115, but I believe in you. I started school on Wednesday, so updates will probably be less often on the sequel, but I think my writing has gotten better over the past... 53 pages! Holy Cow! That's alot!**

**I hope that this fanfic has been more satisfying to you Addex fans than the actual Season 3 was. I mean, making out it a NICU? "You're not my girlfriend"? OOC in my opinion, so I wrote this. And this is the season finale. Which, as you know, means... CLIFFHANGER! Which is why you want a sequel. Which is why you will give me one last review.**

**This is probably slightly rated M, but I think it's appropriate for anyone over the age of 13, so whatev. **

**I hope you savor this chapter. It could be the last.**

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_Holy mother fucking shit, where the hell could she have gone? Maybe she moved? Maybe she left? Maybe she got in a car accident as she was fleeing the scene, she sensed that Alex loved her and had the good sense to run for her life? _

_Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit… _

He ran into Derek. Wow, just the person he wanted to see, her ex-husband. "Sorry, Dr. Shepherd."

He raised one of his eyebrows. "What's wrong with you Karev? No snide comeback? No quirky remark? No hitting on my girlfriend at a bar, or telling her about my personal business with Addison?"

"No, sir."

"Hey, why are you still here? Dr. Montgomery's shift ended 20 minutes ago; don't you have the same schedule as her?"

_Addison__'s shift ended 20 minutes ago. You dumb-ass!_ "I was just leaving, Dr. Shepherd," he managed to squeak out before starting to sprint to the intern's locker room. Then he realized a flaw in his plan, and turned back around. "Dr. Shepherd?" he called down the hallway. "What's her hotel room number?"

"2214," he called back. _Intern's these days. Always yelling, doing everything at warp speed— _

_Why the hell did he need Addison's hotel room number?_ Luckily he ran into the person to tell him. "Mer, why would Alex need to go to Addison's hotel room?"

Meredith's face broke out into a wide grin. "Sounds like another Dark & Twisty person will get their happy ending tonight…"

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Addison walked in the door of her hotel room, and immediately flopped down on her bed, touching her lips absentmindedly, where Alex's had covered hours before. She sighed. What in the world would happen with that situation? Could they just go to work tomorrow, pretend nothing had happened? Maybe it didn't mean anything to him. But how could that be?

She resigned herself to the fact that she would know nothing more until the following morning, and proceeded to start brushing her hair, attempting to remove the snarls Alex himself had probably made in their little make out session.

Then, in a period of about 30 seconds, the door bell rang, she answered it, Alex was re-snarling her hair, the door was slammed behind them, and she was in the exact same position on her bed, with the addition of a certain man she was in love with.

Addison forced herself to untangle from their embrace when it started getting heated, knowing in a few seconds, she wouldn't be able to say no. "Alex…" she said distractedly, for his hand _definitely_ wasn't in her _hair_ anymore… "Why are you here?"

He responded, in such an Alex way it made her want to kiss him more, "I'm kinda, slightly, barely… fuck it, I'm drowning in love with you, and I need you to help me breathe."

Her breath caught, as she was motionless for a few moments. Then, with no warning, she flipped them over, and pinned him down on his back to her king sized bed. Staring directly into his eyes, which were sparkling from the full moon outside the window she had forgotten to close… "I love you, too. And I've decided I like backtalk."

He returned her smile. "Does that mean I've won a case?" And flipped them again, him on top once more. But he hadn't won, as he realized he didn't know where her hands were.

He groaned in pleasure when he found them, and she responded—"Not if I beat you to it."

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The first time was fast, as they both wanted to be where they hadn't been in much too long. It took less than 5 minutes before the deed was done.

The second time was more thoughtful, as Addison took the lead, hitting, touching, licking, and sucking all of the right spots. The third may have been a tiny bit faster, but that's because it was Alex's turn to be in charge.

By the time the fourth came around, it was the dead of night, and the rest of the world was quiet, like they knew that they shouldn't interrupt the earth shattering—no, the earth _mending_ thing that was going on. Addison and Alex wouldn't have noticed anyways, for the only thing they were paying attention to were each other, eyes locking as they moved oh-so-slowly for a beautiful eternity, until coming at the same time, gently. Afterwards, Alex opened his mouth, about to say something, but before he could ruin the magic, Addison caught his lips with hers, rolled on top of him, inched the sheets up with her toes, and tucked them in together, as the moonlight lulled the lovers asleep.

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_Beautiful day _

_Watching you as you awake_

_Morning stars in your eyes  
Your hand in mine_

Alex woke hazily, his body entangled with hers, her crimson locks sticking to his sweat clad body, as the rising sun beat down from the east facing window of her hotel. He inhaled her, all of her—a mixture of her conditioner, the OR, and obviously the after math of last night, rising from her sweet naked body as she gently dozed.

_The sky is lit up  
Day will be richer than night  
So don't think of yesterday  
It's here and now_

Last night had just been the beginning, he realized. He had a lifetime to look forward to. "I'm kinda, slightly, barely… fuck it, I'm drowning in love with you." Not exactly eloquent, but it just was. And Addison made him tell the truth.

_It's a, it's a, it's a new day  
It's a, it's a, it's a new day _

A fresh start was what they both needed. God knows she wanted to move on from Derek, Mark… could he possibly be what she needed? Could he set her back on the right track?

Could she do the same to him?

_The beauty of you  
Gives me my fortitude  
Stronger than any dark cloud  
Screaming out loud_

As he lay there, he kept thinking of what it had been like for Derek to lay next to her. Older, more mature… a real man. But still… what kind of man would leave her?

And how could he compare to what she had had with him?

_The sky is lit up  
Day will be richer than night  
So don't think of yesterday  
It's here and now_

All of a sudden, tt came back to him in a wave… and he was drowning again. _Izzie Olivia, father, mother, pain, punch, push, close, Izzie, Olivia, father, mother, pain, punch, punch, push, close… _

He was 22 again, applying for med school, standing in line, and there was Steve from Walker High School. "You're going to med school? Karev, you're messed up. How could you ever learn to heal when you've never been able to heal yourself?"

_Its a, its a, its a...new day  
Its a, its a, its a...new day_

He told her he loved her. She told him she loved him. _Could_ she love him? Could anyone? Was he destined to over and over again fail, like he had done so many times before?

_She's just so fucking beautiful. _

If he left now, she would be hurt. But she wasn't really in love with him. She was in love with the Alex who sucked up to her, who acted like he wanted her to perceive him, so she would possibly someday love him back. Nothing was real. Nothing was real, her love wasn't real, staying would hurt her more. What to do, what to do, what to do…

"Karev, you're messed up. How could you ever learn to heal when you've never been able to heal yourself?"

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_Its a, its a, its a...new day  
Its a, its a, its a...new day_

Addison woke up to the warmth of the sun, first groaning at the heat, but then remembered the events of the previous night, and sighed in ecstasy. Alex, Alex, Alex… noble like Derek, cunning like Mark, but just… Alex. She reached over to touch him.

All she got was a fistful of sheets.

She turned over. There she was, naked in her bed, the morning after having sex— making love, really… looking forward to what was going to come, after what they had said, what they had _done_, last night…

But the room was empty. Her heart was empty. She was alone in her bed once again, and Alex was gone.

_--------- _

_Grey's Anatomy _

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**There it is. "A New Day". An alternate Season 3 for Addison and Alex. If you review one more time, then you will get an alternate Season 4 slash NOT Private Practice for Addison and Alex.**

**Addex love to you all. And also, as hard as it is to read, it was harder to write. Bear with me.**

**It's been fun! Review, make me happy, soothe my aching Addex heart...**


	15. Author's Note

Hey! I just posted the sequel, Do You Want to be Loved? You can find it on my author page. **:-D** Thank you again to everyone who reviewed this one!


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